if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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