you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I am naked and annoyed.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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