just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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