11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
