My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
