im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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