PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
