I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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