I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
