I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
