your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize
