the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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