that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
