I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
