haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
