I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
