Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
well you can't waste a boner
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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