Non-Jews are for practice
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
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