She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
