i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
