have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Randomize
