I like to think it a success when the cops are called
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
