Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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