Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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