We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
