There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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