"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
