Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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