Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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