You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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