Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
