She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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