I'm lost and stupid without you.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time