this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
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aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
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I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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