i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
