considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize