Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
