He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.