I am puke
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
