have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Randomize
