we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
why is half of my head shaved?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
