It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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