it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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