Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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