Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
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