Whatcha textin bout Willis?
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
