please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
