How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Randomize
