i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
