So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.